The Meaning of Life and Other Vegetables

The message spread swiftly through the dark woods. It leapt from one campfire to another, where the survivors were huddled in twos and threes, trying desperately to fight away the cold, the fear, the loneliness, the despair.

“Starting the day after the next full moon, and for ten days, the MDRA will hand out survival kits at the old military bunker near the freeway exit.”

The next full moon would be, Twinkle estimated, in 3 nights.

“What do you make of it?”, asked Dawn. “Do you think it’s for real?”

“I don’t know”, replied Twinkle. “I didn’t think the Agency was still running.”

“So it’s a good thing, right?”

“Yeah, I guess. We’ll have to go there and see. But we’ll have to be careful. You never know these days”, Twinkle said, staring at the distant, faint flicker in the dark which was the Petersons’ campfire.

***

They approached slowly, coming out from among the tall trees. It was well into the morning, and a small crowd was already gathered on the other side of the dirt road, near the bunker’s entrance. A single military-coloured vehicle was parked near the gate, next to a flimsy booth made of camouflage net. Several uniformed staff were manning a plain table and the back of the vehicle. There was a hushed, tense atmosphere about it all, and order was maintained. Two armed soldiers were positioned strategically, fingers on the trigger, ready to react if necessary.

After observing from afar for ten minutes, Twinkle said “Come on Dawn, it looks all right. I’ll lead. Whatever happens, stay next to me. If I’m hit, run for the woods.”

“I’m not leaving you behind!” Protested Dawn.

“Listen to me, Dawn. You’ve watched too many movies in your old life. It works differently in real life. If I’m hit you probably won’t be able to help me anymore, and if you stay you’d only get hit too. What’s the point? You should at least save yourself.”

“Oh, shut up already. Let’s go. I’m sure no one’s going to get hurt.”

“Always the optimist, eh?…”

They both laughed and began approaching.

It didn’t take too long before they got in front of the table. A rather tall person in uniform, with short brown hair and pale blue eyes looked directly at them, as if measuring them.

“Are any of you over eighteen?”

“Yes, my nineteenth birthday was a few months before the collapse”, replied Twinkle.

“And who is this young lady?”

“This is Dawn, my sister. She’s 15.”

“All right, then. You’re in charge, what we call the RA – the Responsible Adult”, said the uniformed agent. “I’m going to take down some details and then I’ll give you your kit. Given Name?”

“Twinkle.”

“Seriously?…”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Well, OK, I guess it’s as good as anything these days. And with you we have Dawn, right? Good. Surname please?”

“Davis. Does that work for you, sir?”

“Don’t get funny with me. I’m just doing my job here. You should be thankful we’re still able to cater for you guys.”

“Sure, very thankful. Can we get our kit now, please?”

“One moment please”.

The agent approached the back of the military truck, where another agent handed him a small, grey-coloured, sealed cardboard box. Then he returned to the table and put it down next to his clipboard. As far as Twinkle could tell, there was no print on the box except for a small serial code imprinted in red ink, next to one of the corners: DWX15A-8

The agent filled in a row on his clipboard: DWX15A-8; Davis; Twinkle, M, 19; Dawn, F, 15.

“Now listen to me, young man. It is very important that you pay close attention. Inside this box there are several items and an instructions sheet. Each and every item inside is essential for your survival until the government can start rebuilding. Read the instructions carefully and follow them.”

“Eh… OK… I guess”, muttered Twinkle.

“I will not go through the contents with you now, we don’t have time for that, but there’s one item in there with special importance. It’s a radio receiver that will help us communicate with you in the future. It is solar powered, make sure to give it enough sunshine to keep the battery charged, and leave it on at all times. We might broadcast general announcements. If we need to contact you personally we will first announce your serial code, your surname and the RA’s given name. So keep your ears open, we might message you. If that happens, you won’t be able to message back, so just come over here within 3 days. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good. Next please!”

***

So that was that.

They made their way back to their camp. The long way, of course. One has to be careful these days. As much as Twinkle could tell, no one saw them, except for maybe the Petersons, but they were good people. A harmless, older couple, actually. And the Petersons knew their camping spot anyway. In fact, they’ve helped them in the past, when Dawn got that nasty bite two months earlier. So they were safe. Kind of.

It was already twilight when they arrived back, so Twinkle set off to start the little fire before darkness descended. His fingers itched to open the grey box, but he knew his priorities right. He could look at the contents once the fire was up. Who knows, they might even have some real tea tonight, though subconsciously he knew that tea wasn’t really a survival item, and they’d probably have to keep going on sugarless wild peppermint tea, as they were doing for months. It was quite clever of him to find this spot by a tiny stream, where they had an unlimited supply of fresh, drinkable water, and some wild peppermint as a bonus. He even saw some tiny fish swimming there, but hasn’t managed to catch any yet. Maybe old Peterson could help with that.

After dinner, which consisted of some old crackers they still had – one of those huge tin boxes mum used to keep in the top cupboard, god knows why – and some berries Dawn had collected, they sat together, close to the tiny fire – it was too dangerous to declare your location to the entire world with a big one – to have a look at what the grey box held. Twinkle carefully pried the metal staples that held the box sealed, and lifted the lid. The box had 7 items in it, and a single page of instructions.

A bar of coarse soap

Water purifying tablets

A brick of solid fuel

A radio receiver

A 2x2m piece of waterproof tarp

A box of matches

A potato seedling

And that was the lot.

Twinkle felt a mixture of excitement and disappointment. Can that be really it?… Some of it would make great use, but some seemed weird, not to say plain stupid. A potato seedling?

Dawn was just happy that someone was watching over them.

Twinkle had a closer look at the items.

A bar of soap. Yeah, that would be nice, and definitely gives a feeling of still being civilised, but do we really need it? Not for survival, that’s for sure.

Water purifying tablets. We won’t need these, not after we’ve been drinking straight from this stream for months. Obviously it’s safe. But you never know, it might run dry later in the year. And besides, not everyone is that clever or lucky to be camped right next to such a drinkable water source. The MDRA must think of the worst.

Solid fuel. Cool. Not necessary at the moment but might come handy later.

Radio receiver. So this is what the guy was talking about. It was an elongated, cream-coloured plastic box with few features. A tiny solar panel on top, tightly attached to the box. A circular pattern of tiny holes at the front – apparently a speaker. An ON/OFF switch at the side, and a single red LED above it. No inscriptions whatsoever. No volume control. Economical, Twinkle thought. Absent-minded, Twinkle moved the switch to the ON position, and surprisingly the red LED shone in the dark. A soft hiss sounded for a couple of seconds, then silence resumed as the receiver went into standby mode. Nice, thought Twinkle. Need to remember to place it in the sun tomorrow, he thought, and left the receiver turned on. It took him a while to realise that there was something a bit odd about this receiver. It seemed to be put together using no screws. More than that, it seemed like it was sealed, never to be opened again. There were no levers, grooves, anything. It was as if the back cover was bonded, no – welded, to the box. Then he dismissed that thought – of course, they made it dust and water proof, you idiot. Probably there was a plastic membrane behind the speaker holes, to prevent water entering. Duh…?

The tarp would definitely be handy. They managed to build a rain shelter out of branches and large leaves – sort of – but that tarp would be a great improvement. It would be nice to be able to stay dry, really dry, for a change. You could also use it as a ground insulator, alternatively. Or for collecting rain water…

Matches. They still had the lighter from the house, which he used for starting the campfire, but he was already wondering how long it would last or what they’d do if it broke. Yeah, he learned how to start a fire with a flint and some dry grass, or by quickly rotating a dry stick against a piece of dry wood when he was a young Scout, but they never taught him how to start a fire in a damp environment. Oh, how nice it all seemed back then, in the dry, covered area behind the Scouts hall… Of course, the matches would eventually run out, but it was just a back-up, and besides, it will be all right. They only need to survive out here a few more months… he hoped. Actually, he wished for another lighter, but the matches will have to do.

Last was the potato seedling. That was the oddest bit. What were they thinking?… Strange enough, the seedling seemed in good shape. How that was possible, he did not know. Maybe they packed the kits only a short while earlier. Maybe it was one of those engineered plants. Never mind. The plant seemed healthy, green, upright, almost as if eager to be planted in the ground and prosper. Tomorrow we’ll do something about it, Twinkle thought and put the seedling back in the box.

Then he took the instructions and started to read:

You have been issued with a standard MDRA survival kit.

Contents:

1 x soap bar

30 x standard water purifying tablets (see use instructions below)

1 x solid fuel unit

1 x radio receiver

1 x 2x2m waterproof tarpaulin

1 x all-weather match box (30 matches)

1 x enhanced potato seedling

Please read the instructions below and follow carefully.

Twinkle skimmed through the rest impatiently, then the section discussing the potato seedling caught his attention:

The potato seedling you have been issued has the potential to provide you valuable food. Do not consume the plant as the leaves contain a naturally-occurring poison. Plant the seedling in loose soil, about 15cm deep, on a sunny spot, and water sufficiently. Avoid excessive watering. Potatoes should be ready for harvest in 3-4 months. Do not consume the entire crop as food; use some of the new bulbs for the next generation. If properly handled, this food source can last indefinitely.

Last, there was an additional note:

We are unable at this stage to support you in obtaining meat or any other protein-rich nutrient. We are working on it and will inform you through your receiver. Stay alert.

Oh well, thought Twinkle. I guess we’ll have to become hunters.

***

But he was rather wrong.

A month has gone by. They planted the potato seedling not far from the stream, in a little sunny clearance. Luckily it was spring so the little plant had just enough sunshine to prosper. It seemed to come along quite nicely.

Then, one day, the radio suddenly came to life.

It started with a short hiss, then a series of ten high-pitch beeps, apparently aimed at drawing attention.

Dawn called “Hey, Twinkle, the radio! Come here, quick!” Twinkle was not far away so he was right next to the radio, that was recharging in the sun, in a few seconds.

“DWX15A-8, Davis, Twinkle; DWX15A-8, Davis, Twinkle; DWX15A-8, Davis, Twinkle; Stand by to receive you message.” The whole sequence repeated five times in total, then a few more beeps were heard, then “Please report to the bunker within three days to receive essential supplies”, repeated five times.

“Yay, we’re getting more! What do you think they’ll give us this time?” said Dawn.

“I haven’t got a clue. But I reckon it will be something useful. We’ll go tomorrow, it’s too late today.”

***

The next day they emerged out of the wood and approached the bunker hesitantly. There were no others around, but a military vehicle was parked next to the gate. As they drew closer, a uniformed agent, carrying a visible, large sidearm, came out of the vehicle and positioned himself next to the vehicle’s back door.

“Good morning”, said Twinkle, “we received a message the we should…”

“Identify yourself, please.”

“Twinkle Davis.”

“Do you have an ID code, Twinkle Davis?”

“Er… yeah, sure, I think it was DWX15A or something. Right, Dawn?…”

Dawn looked puzzled. She hardly ever paid attention to their code, let alone memorised it.

“All right, that should do for our purposes. I understand that that’s miss Dawn Davis there?”

“Yup.”

“OK, here’s the deal. You’re getting some meat today. It’s frozen, for obvious reasons. Should last the way back, wherever you came from, but it will be partly thawed when you get there. Let it thaw completely, then cook it over fire and consume promptly. I wouldn’t take unnecessary risks with it. I don’t know when the next time will be, so make the most of it. I wish we could promise more, but that’s all we have for the time being. Will give you a protein and iron boost, though. Oh, and don’t worry about its quality. It’s MDRA-guaranteed. Make sure to roast it through and you should be fine.”

Twinkle thought the guy had the slightest smile in his eyes as he uttered the last sentence, but he dismissed the notion as ridiculous, immediately. Probably just his own imagination. When he looked again the agent looked as serious and unfriendly as ever.

Then they were handed a chunk of frozen meat, about 1kg, in cling wrap. And they headed off.

***

Back at the camp, Twinkle lighted the fire and was getting ready to cook the meat.

Dawn said “So nice, I can’t remember when we last had meat. I’m not sure I even remember how meat tastes. Do you think it’s good? How did they even get it?”

“Yeah, I guess it should be fine. I’ll make sure to cook it through. They probably got hold of some cattle that survived, that’s why they’re rationing it. I’m kind of glad they have running freezers, it means they still have electricity, one way or another.”

“Yeah, you got a point. Do you think it will take long before we can go back?”

“I don’t know. I hope not too long. I miss sleeping in a bed and having a proper bath, though washing in this stream is not bad, especially since they gave us the soap.”

Later they had the meat. It tasted fairly fresh, though it was a little chewy and left a bit of an aftertaste. Both noticed it but quickly concluded that it was a combination of the freezing and the cooking over open flame, more accurately overcooking… and the fact that they haven’t tasted any meat in months.

***

Another month or two have passed. No more messages were received on the radio, even though Twinkle made sure to place it in the sun every day (and the red LED was shining all right), and kept his ears open all the time. They were getting used to living in the wild, and after Old Peterson had taught Twinkle how to catch, clean and cook some fish from the stream, their diet improved, although after a short while they started getting sick of fish. I wish they’d given us some more of that meat, Twinkle thought. The potato bush was coming along really nice, and soon would be ready for harvest. At least that. And they were already part way into summer, so the days were longer and the nights weren’t that cold anymore.

Then one night something happened.

They’ve already put out the fire and went to sleep. A short while after Twinkle fell asleep, he was awakened by shots. At least that’s what he thought. Those weren’t loud bangs, but rather hushed puffs. Silencers, he thought. No way, a voice in his head said, you’ve watched too many movies in your old life. No shouts or cries were heard. In fact, after a short while it was all silent again. Twinkle lied awake and wondering for several minutes longer. Dawn didn’t even wake up. The voices he heard – or thought he heard – came from the general direction of the Petersons’ camp. Should I go there? No, it’s probably nothing. I’ll check with them in the morning.

Then he drifted away into sleep.

The next morning they went over. The Petersons were nowhere to be seen. Their stuff was there and looked quite normal. Twinkle was puzzled and a little disturbed.

“They’re probably somewhere around here, and will be back eventually”, he said.

“Exactly. We also leave the camp sometimes during the day”, Dawn replied.

But the Petersons were not back by dusk. And not the next day. Or the day after that. Twinkle had a closer look around their camp, trying to crack the mystery. There was no blood, no signs of violence. It seemed that nothing was taken. The only unusual findings were drawing marks on the ground, about ten meters long, as if someone had dragged a sack of flour through the dry leaves bed. The marks ended at a random point, and that was it. There was nothing further.

“Hey Dawn”, Twinkle said as they were sitting near the fire that night, “you know, I heard something the night before the Petersons disappeared.”

“Oh, did you? What was it?”

“I’m not sure. I wasn’t even sure I heard anything, but now that the Petersons are gone, I think it was real. It came from their general direction. I think it was shots.”

“Shots…? Don’t be paranoid. I would’ve heard them too, wouldn’t I? My sleep is not that deep out here.”

“Dawn, I’m not being paranoid. I think it was really shots. With silencers, you know.”

“Come on, Twinkle!… Silencers??? You’ve watched too many…”

“Movies in my old life?…” he interrupted her. “That’s my catchphrase, you can’t use it on me!…”

They both laughed, forgetting their situation for a moment.

“Listen Dawn, it sounded like nothing I heard before, at least in real life. And it’s too much of a coincidence. I’m going to get to the bottom of it.”

“I’m sure you will, bro.”

***

The next few days Twinkle seemed distant, distracted.

Then, early one morning Dawn woke up to the sound of banging and crushing. She sat up and saw Twinkle holding a big rock, then fiercely hitting an object on the ground. She jumped with alarm, calling “Are you OK, Twinkle?”

He stopped for a moment and looked at her.

“Yes, I’m OK. We’re OK, now. We were in great danger, but we’re safe now. I’ve figured it all out.”

Somewhat relieved but still puzzled, she blinked her eyes in confusion and just stood there for a few seconds. Then she realised what it was that Twinkle was attacking.

It was the survival kit’s radio receiver. It was smashed, pieces scattered on the ground by the stream.

“Have you gone mad?! Why did you do that? How will they find us now?…”

“Exactly! They won’t. I don’t want them to find us.”

“What about more supplies? What about the meat?”

“I don’t want their damn meat! I’ve figured it all out.”

“Twinkle, you are scaring me. Stop it, please.”

“Dawn, I’m not crazy. I‘ll tell you everything. I know what happened to the Petersons. Let’s have a cup of peppermint tea and I’ll tell you everything. Trust me, sis.”

And they did. Then Twinkle started:

“Dawn, do you remember that cool electronics workspace dad had in the garage, back in the days? Well, dad used to show me stuff over there. Did you know he was kind of an electronics genius, in his spare time, after returning from his boring job at the water department? You didn’t?… OK, I guess it was “boys’ stuff”. Never mind. Anyway, he built some cool stuff there. My favourite was something dad called an electronic interrogator. He’d connect the battery, switch it on, and it would start “interrogating” all the other electronics within range. I don’t know exactly how it worked. Dad tried to explain, but I was missing too much basic knowledge to really understand. I only remember he said something about it scanning through frequencies, wave forms, codes, all that stuff… Then, when it caught something responding it would show it on its tiny screen. You wouldn’t see much, just a wave form glowing from a dark background. But dad knew what each form meant, and he taught me some of the basic ones. It was amazing, like those instruments were talking to each other and we were watching the conversation. Ours was the cop, and it was cracking down the criminals, the other devices…”

“I miss Dad. And Mum. But what does all this have to do with us, here, now…?”

“Dawn, do you remember how we left the house, when everything came down? How we quickly went through our stuff, trying to decide what we need to take? Well, I went into the garage looking for dad’s shotgun. It seemed like an obvious choice. I couldn’t find it, but then, when I passed by dad’s electronics bench, I caught a glimpse of that interrogator. It was quite strange, as if it was looking at me, calling me. I remember thinking “hey, the last thing we’ll need in the woods is a piece of electronics”. But somehow, I couldn’t help it. Maybe I felt like I was taking a piece of Dad with me. You know…? So, I grabbed it and its battery, shoved it in the bag, and ran. Turned out that it’s as useful as a shotgun, maybe more.”

“Is it? How exactly?”

“That stupid, evil radio they gave us, I didn’t like it right from the start. It looked suspicious, but I was too busy to think it through at the time. After the Petersons disappeared I began to suspect that there was something wrong going on. I don’t know why, call it a hunch, but I woke up early this morning and decided to interrogate that damned receiver. I wasn’t sure that the interrogator would actually work after all this time, but it did. And guess what, Dawn. It wasn’t an innocent receiver. It’s a homing transponder! They gave it to us so they could find us, anytime, in any weather, in the dark. Like they found the Petersons.”

“What have the Petersons got to do with it?… and what’s wrong with the Agency being able to spot us? If you ask me, it’s a good thing. They could help us if we got in serious trouble, they could find us all when it got safe to go back… For God’s sake, it’s their job, Twinkle!… I understand that you’re upset that they didn’t tell you exactly what that radio was. Big deal. Most people wouldn’t have understood what it means, let alone cared the least about it. What did you want, a colourful brochure outlining all the radio’s functions?… Now, seriously, what difference does it make?”

“Jesus, Dawn, sometimes you’re so naïve. I really hope you’ll grow out of it one day. Did you ever wonder what that meat they gave us really was?… Or why the old Petersons disappeared so neatly while we were sleeping safely two hundred meters away?… Did you think they “all of a sudden” discovered, or raised, a cattle herd, just for us? Dawn, they are harvesting the “less fit” to help the younger generation survive so that they could rebuild the nation!”

“- – -“

“And the best part is the soap.”

“What about the soap?…” gasped Dawn, tears in her eyes.

“Why do you think they included soap in the kit? It’s not exactly necessary for survival.”

“Why then?”

“They wanted to keep the meat healthy. You wouldn’t have wanted to eat a sick animal, would you?… Now guess, why did they include the potato plant? Let’s see if you can figure that out…”

“I think I’m going to be sick.”