The Meaning of Life and Other Vegetables

Hello everyone. I hope you are refreshed.

Continuing from here –

Following in Dr. Hollis’s (and Jung’s, and others’) tracks – having reached young adulthood, we all have well-seated Adaptations. We also have fairly well functioning Egos, that are making sure our adaptations are enforced ruthlessly, with the aim of keeping us safe in our social environment, and as (externally) comfortable as possible.

Fast forward a few years, some of us go and study in university or elsewhere, and typically most of us end up pursuing a career of some kind, or at least having some sort of a job – making a living. Some of us get into long-term relationships (more about that in future posts, maybe), have children, the lot… Generally, follow the societal template to one extent or another.

And all this time – those nagging thoughts… all those ideas in our head… bad ideas… about doing something different… or doing things differently…

Hang on, bad?… Who said so? Our Ego? Okay, that’s understandable – that’s the Ego’s job. It’s protecting us from… ourselves? Remember, the Ego’s mission is security, stability, and if possible – comfort. Womb-style comfort, I mean. All of the above from the perspective of the small, helpless, limited child. It DOES NOT account for the comfort of the adult. I mean deeper comfort. I mean JOY.

And so, the young (or not so young) person finds themselves feeling stuck in the “wrong” career or study. Feeling that “something is missing”, that “it’s not quite right” or “this is not how life was meant to be”. Or even worse, “this is totally messed up.”

Right. The Ego can’t let that continue. It jumps right on the task of “fixing”, and so the internal voice starts saying:

“You need a new plan!”
“Think things through!”
“Set new goals!”
“Work hard! Persevere!”
“Develop better habits!”
“Weed out the unproductive!”
“Get ahead!”
“Earn more!”
“Look at everyone around, they got it right!”
“Get out of your comfort zone!” (to get more comfort, right? Haha)
“Get this!”
“Get that!”
And on, and on, it goes.

None of the above is original. The Ego has poor imagination; all it knows is what it was taught by its social environment. The above are the sign of the times, and essentially the theme of a million and one self-help books and self-proclaimed gurus: Set goals, work hard, get THERE. And “there”, of course, is achievement, more possessions, more status, more prestigious career, better social appearance. Never mind your soul, or your joy, or your silly dreams that will bring no wealth, no security, no acceptance. Never mind what the child you once were ever wanted (or still wants, because it keeps on living inside of you; only now it’s locked up in some forsaken back room of your Self).

And here’s the paradox in all its glory: We feel uneasy, we feel something is not right, and we set out to fix it by working hard against the only thing that can really help.